• Gork@lemm.ee
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        2 months ago

        Start your plans to escape now even though it’s a few years away.

        Find sympathetic family members or close friends who’d be willing to take you in. Preferably someone who your dad doesn’t know, or at the least doesn’t know where they live.

        Act as you usually would around him, don’t have him suspect anything.

        When the time comes, spring your plan into motion. Notify your contacts that you’ll need to be picked up. Pack essentials into a bag. Include vital documentation (birth certificate, social security card, ID) since those can be difficult to replace. Bring your pets if you have them. Leave in the middle of the night when he’s sleeping. Don’t leave a note. Turn off read receipts on your messaging application. Minimize as much leverage as he has over you.

        You’re escaping abuse, so your own personal safety here is paramount, don’t feel like you’re obligated to him in any way. He will try to manipulate you if he knows where you went, so it’s best to just ghost entirely.

      • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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        2 months ago

        Keep your head down, find a good network of extended friends/family you can bolt to in tough times if you haven’t already. Your home is likely a pressure cooker you do not want to be in when you don’t have to be. I’m sorry you have to grow up with this, it’s not right.

        • marinealpaca@lemmy.worldOP
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          2 months ago

          Thanks. I do keep my head down, but he’s very easily irritable. The context of this message for example is I asked him if he could extend my 10 pm bedtime (which is crazy for someone my age to begin with) by JUST 30 MINUTES.

          • radiohead37@lemmynsfw.com
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            2 months ago

            Dude, at your age, I would go out with friends and not come back until noon the next day. All of that without ever telling them I was going out in first place.

            • marinealpaca@lemmy.worldOP
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              2 months ago

              He has a special belt he named “St Nicholas”. “Go fetch St Nicholas for me”. That’s all I have to say.

                • marinealpaca@lemmy.worldOP
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                  2 months ago

                  Unfortunately in the “great” state of Texas where we live corporal punishment with belt, brush, etc. does not constitute child abuse.🙃

                  • Lightor@lemmy.world
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                    2 months ago

                    I’d still document it. When you move out and he asks if you’re coming by for Christmas or whatever just send him a video of him beating you and say “what do you think”.

                    Post them on Facebook and tag him. Let the world and all his close friends know how he acts.

                  • bassomitron@lemmy.world
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                    2 months ago

                    Ummm, to an extent.

                    https://texaslawhelp.org/article/corporal-punishment

                    If a child is showing signs of lasting marks, bruises, burns, broken bones, or other physical injuries, this is likely abusive.

                    If it’s leaving lasting bruises, even in Texas that may be where they draw the line? If it happens incessantly, along with verbal abuse, you may be able to get some help.

                    That being said, getting tossed into the foster care system isn’t often an improvement. My suggestion, besides maybe discretely seeking resources, is to focus on near term goals of becoming self sufficient and getting the hell out of there as fast as you can. Pieces of shit like this guy don’t deserve children.

                  • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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                    2 months ago

                    Sorry hit post too early. Just keep your head down and build your network, that is your armor. Do not let him send you to some sort of “troubled teen” program whatever you do.

                  • Lena@gregtech.eu
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                    2 months ago

                    As an European, I’m so sorry for you. I hope it gets better. I can’t imagine living in such a crazy country.

                  • Metz@lemmy.world
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                    2 months ago

                    Well that is beyond fucked up. here in germany you go to jail right away if you slap your child. Using the belt would be considered aggravated assault here and he would be gone for the next 2 years at least. It is completely insane that something like this could be legal.

              • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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                2 months ago

                Document that shit, leave your phone on recording (discretely away from you).

          • Crazyslinkz@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Not to take light of the situation, but 10 pm bedtime isn’t unreasonable if you have problems waking up in the morning.

            I have no context therefore I won’t judge.

            Please stay safe, it’s unfortunate that humans such as your dad, sir, has children and no idea how to raise them.