As a kid that used be the question that made me panic. Some teacher or parent would ask “What’s up?” In a casual manner and I would just freeze. To this day I have no idea what the proper response is. I assume it isn’t to start talking about orbits.
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I like the networking analogies. Autistic (and a lot of neurodivergent) people are UDP natural because we just spit out information. What we really need us something like QUIC so that information can be exchanged efficiently.
“No, Signal”
That’s pretty good actually. I might use that at a cyber event.
Just chillin
There’s a ton of nuance here depending on how it’s said. “What’s up” can be said so fast as a greeting that another “What’s up?” is an appropriate response, or my favorite “sup?” Or, it can be asked kind of carefully that it expects an actual answer. Either way, no response is really wrong, but can increase awkwardness if not answering in the expected way.
Livin’ the dream
But what if I am not living the dream?
You say it sarcastically.
Oh
Only time I say that shit
I usually hit em with the old
WE MEET AGAIN
I usually say “not much”
CHICKEN BUTT!!!
^(sorry I had to)^
“Livin’ the dream”
“But it’s a nightmare”
Just reply, “hello.” If they want more information, they will ask for it. Usually they don’t, and then you’re free from social anxiety.
If they ask, “how are you?” “how’s it going?” etc. I always reply with, “never better!” which can come across as sarcastic but in my experience not in a way that makes anyone feel like I’m being a dick. If it does, we probably don’t function on the same wavelength and they don’t ask again, so nothing is lost socially for either of us. And, since I might actually be feeling never better, it’s not lying in that case; whereas, if I have felt better then it is sarcastic, and not dishonest because most people already clock that answer as sarcasm and don’t follow up with any additional questions.
On the rare occasion when they do follow up with, “what’s wrong?” or similar, I feel they’ve opened up the floodgates and I vent my frustration or go into detail on things most people don’t seem to want technical details on. They usually don’t do that more than once, but the people who do tend to become friends.
“Same old. The horror persists but so do I.”
Just reply back “hey”. No one is looking for a real reply.
This is one of those frustrating social conventions that’s partly a greeting and partly a way to find out if you’re busy (particularly if they are asking if you’re in the middle of doing something or are speaking to the other person on the phone/via message where they can’t see what you’re doing).
A good response, as mentioned in another reply here, is “Not much. You?” or “Not much - how about yourself?” if you haven’t done anything out of the ordinary or aren’t really busy.
If you have done something that you think the other person might find interesting, though, give them a brief answer, e.g. “Oh, just had lunch at a new restaurant. The food was great.” Keeping it short then allows the other person to either ask a follow-up question if they are actually interested, or to move the conversation along to the actual topic they wanted to discuss with you.
If you are actually busy and in the middle of a task, then a short and polite response and suggestion to reschedule works, e.g. “Sorry, just in the middle of painting the spare room… can I get back to you tonight?”
“Not much. You?” If you don’t have much going on.
“Not much, just finishing up this essay before I head to soccer.” If you are doing something that might interest the person asking, or to explain your presence somewhere you aren’t usually.
The person is just checking in with you. It’s basically “hello”
I colloquially prefer “notta whole lotta.”
