I’ve tried, believe me, nothing works. Therapy doesn’t do shit, medication doesn’t do shit, I’ve been like this for ten years now and it just keeps getting worse. Seems like there’s no way out but the easy way out.

I’ve been leaning more towards the “not” side for a while. A frequent thought is “I don’t want to live like this anymore, and if this is the only way I get to live, maybe I don’t want to live.”