Hossenfeffer

My mother once answered the door to some Jehovah’s Witnesses on her knees and brandishing a huge pair of upholstery scissors (she was trimming a bit of carpet).

Their faith was clearly tested and I can only assume they failed the test since they hummed and hawwed and said something about coming back later but never did.

“Would you like your receipt to be emailed to you?”

“No thanks, would you like to masturbate with a cheese-grater?”

Look to get out of their way, move over, pull over, whatever, and try to let them past.

I like to imagine that anyone who is tailgaiting me is a bomb-defusal tech on their way to defuse a bomb at an orphanage for blind children. Then I get out of their way and wish them god speed to their vital mission! “Go save those blind orphans, you goddam hero!”

I mostly play video games to switch off and relax. So generally I play single player RPGs on the easiest setting and just explore the world and the story.

I do occasionally play something like PUBG if I’m after some excitement but I don’t have time to master games like I did when I had no responsibilities or kids!